.072 - a hostile (not) takeover

[captain_jtkirk]

[Much like when the Admiral makes an announcement, Kirk's voice permeates the entire Barge. Though unlike the Admiral, this voice is pretty easy to pin down. And it's glaringly obvious that it isn't the Admiral.]

Attention people of the Barge, this is Jim Kirk speaking. It's just two things so I'll be brief. The Admiral's not flying this thing right now and you people better start looking for your swimsuits.


[ooc: And this has started! By now Kirk has set their course for Risa. No going back now, suckers. He sealed the way behind him, just fyi]

Comments

[gotgreenmagic]

...

So this is an incredibly well-reasoned decision that won't horribly backfire.

[captain_jtkirk]

It's just the beach.

[trenchcoatedly]

You're controlling the ship?

[captain_jtkirk]

Yep.

[Private]

[batmanschmatman]

[Flatly:] "I can't get up there again without Jack Harkness"?

[Private]

[captain_jtkirk]

[There's a moment of guilt for that.]

I found another way.

[insolubleriddle]

I volunteer for the position of second in command.

[captain_jtkirk]

I'm not looking for volunteers but thanks anyway.

[imaythrowuponyou]

What the hell do you think you're doing?

[captain_jtkirk]

Giving him a taste of his own medicine.

Private

[buywithme]

I hope you're prepared for everyone to vividly overreact to this again, Comrade.

I seem to recall last time you gave us all champagne?

[HINT HINT]

Private

[captain_jtkirk]

It's crossed my mind.

Don't you like gin better?

[inhistorybooks]

What the hell are you doing?

[captain_jtkirk]

Proving a point.

[breakingmyheart]

[Oh look, Tosh, the Flashback Fairy came to give you your memories back.]

Is - is Jack with you?

[captain_jtkirk]

[OH GOD OH GOD YOU REMEMBER :C]

No. I'm alone.

[thestarspangledman]

...Jim, what are you up to?

[captain_jtkirk]

I feel like it's fairly obvious, Steve.

1/2

[timesbureaucrat]

[Narvin spends a few nanospans being shocked at this turn of events.]

2/2

[timesbureaucrat]

[Then shifts to fury.]

You reckless, idiotic, lunatic human! I did not sign on to be flown by some amateur. Do you even know the first thing about transdimensional travel? The Blinovich Limitation Effect? Paradox disruptions? Get out of there this instant.

[creatingalegacy]

When you're inevitably kicked out of the control room or whatever, I hope you get your cocky fuckin' ass handed to you by angry inmates and/or wardens.

[captain_jtkirk]

Charming.

[twoheadsofcabbage]

[Scrad asks:]

Question: is this a threat to suicide crash us all into some planet's ocean-

[Charlie continues:]

Or are we talkin' vacation here?

[captain_jtkirk]

Just a vacation. I don't have a death wish.

[impure_tale]

Again?

[captain_jtkirk]

History repeats itself, I'm told.

[19centconstable]

Oh Captain. When I suggested someone with experience assist the Admiral in brushing up on his driving skills, this isn't the sort of thing I had in mind.

[captain_jtkirk]

I wish it was about that, George. I really do.

[video]

[deadliestviper]

[Excuse Beatrix for a moment as she laughs her ass off. Kudos to you, Jim, you've hijacked the ship and made her do the impossible.] What the fuck? I was expecting weird shit on this ship but not this kind of weird shit. Where are you taking us?

[video]

[captain_jtkirk]

[Success!] A beach.

[truth_is_cold]

What are you doing? Where are we going?

[captain_jtkirk]

I think I answered both of those already. I'm driving and we're going to a beach.

[buildindreemz]

Way to encourage good behavior among the inmates, Jim.

At least tell me you didn't injure the Admiral.

[captain_jtkirk]

Haven't seen him.

[ Private ]

[surfaceshine]

[Have an exceptionally intensely interested hunter, Kirk.]

...Don't suppose you'd be interested in some backup? I've got a Masters in cover fire.

[ Private ]

[captain_jtkirk]

I'm not expecting anyone to shoot at me. They'd have to get to me first.

Audio:

[i_like_your]

Are you planning to relinquish control? If so, when?

Audio:

[captain_jtkirk]

In a few days.

Audio:

[childhood_surgery]

And how did you accomplish that?

Audio:

[captain_jtkirk]

It's a secret.

[hourglass_twin]

How did you manage that?

[captain_jtkirk]

I'm just that good.

[notthatfondue]

And why, pray tell, do I have the feeling that this may not have been the... best idea?

[captain_jtkirk]

Oh come on. Aren't you even a little impressed?

[maxwells_demon]

You see all of the other people ganging up on you and saying what a terrible idea this is?

It probably is. Probably.

But it sounds like fun. Bring it on, cap'n.

[captain_jtkirk]

Thank you.

What's your name?

[video]

[hungryanhorny]

Didn't think it worked that way.

Re: [video]

[captain_jtkirk]

Guess it does.

[ichoosefight]

Swimsuits?

...

Beach trip?

[captain_jtkirk]

That's the plan.