.056 - lol back

[captain_jtkirk]

[This is Papa Kirk. In true Christmas special fashion, he's come back to town. And he's a little drunk. AND YEAH I USE SEAN BEAN.]

Little baaaaby, pa rum pa pummm ppuuum I am a poooooooor boy too, pa, rum, pa, pum, pum pum ra ra pum pum pum pa.

Fuck. This song's repetitive.

Pump pa rum pa pum pum.

Comments

[damnitjocelyn]

... Dad?

[captain-jtkirk.livejournal.com]

Leonard! Son!

[damnitjocelyn]

Are you drunk?

[captain-jtkirk.livejournal.com]

Hmmmmmmm, nope? I remembered your name, didn't I?

[damnitjocelyn]

That doesn't prove anything!

MISPLACED RAGE GO

[buywithme.livejournal.com]

Of course he's drunk, he's way too much of a colossal fucking tool to come back sober.

[Lol says John, in an obviously drunken manner.]

ALL THE MISPLACED RAGE

[damnitjocelyn]

And what the hell does that make you?

Re: MISPLACED RAGE GO

[officerrenaldi.livejournal.com]

You guys are both colossal tools.

[captain-jtkirk.livejournal.com]

Hello to you too, John.

Private

[gotgreenmagic.livejournal.com]

J--

...

Oh my God, what is wrong with you? This is your grand entrance, James, after how long? I can't even remember how long you've been--

Are you drunk?

Private

[captain-jtkirk.livejournal.com]

Pum pum pa Sherry!

I have had.... some sherry. Not you. But you know. Not a lot.

Private

[gotgreenmagic.livejournal.com]

[SIGH.]

Come over, now. I'm not letting you see your kids until you are at least a change of clothes and a cup of coffee better off.

Private

[captain-jtkirk.livejournal.com]

Yes ma'am. [He saluted, yes he did :|] I suppose it's too much to ask for to put whiskey in the coffee?

Private

[gotgreenmagic.livejournal.com]

Damn right it is. I could spring for aspirin if you ask nicely.

[officerrenaldi.livejournal.com]

Daddy!

[Carla is 13 and following in her father's footsteps man. At least she would and will at some point. Unless something is done.]

Did you bring me a present?

[captain-jtkirk.livejournal.com]

Hey baby girl. [At least someone's happy to see him :c] Of course I brought you something. Who do you take me for?

[officerrenaldi.livejournal.com]

[Haters gonna hate dad]

Yay!

[beneath all of this manipulative exterior she cares about her dad man. It's sad.] Jim drew a dick on the wall outside one of the stores. Are we gonna get arrested?

[captain-jtkirk.livejournal.com]

[She's clearly his favorite :c] ... he did what?

You won't get arrested. Unless you helped him.

[officerrenaldi.livejournal.com]

[clearly] He drew a dick on the wall of one of the stores. I told him not to because they were going to arrest all of us but Jeez.

[eyeroll] no. Have not helped him. [in awhile.]

I'm glad you're back Daddy. I'll make Dinner for when you get here.

[expectremorse.livejournal.com]

[Ah. Concerned parental moment. Mr. Hoffman has a bone to pick with you and your...kiiids.]

Welcome back Mr. Kirk.

[captain-jtkirk.livejournal.com]

[I want a paternity test on all of them :\]

Thank you, sir.

I would apologize for all the threadjacking but

[damnitjocelyn]

[YOU ARE THE WORST PARENT EVER.]

liar

[captain-jtkirk.livejournal.com]

[I MEAN, YOUR MOTHER MIGHT HAVE BEEN A WHORE.

............... what happened to your mother anyway :c]

[expectremorse.livejournal.com]

[Chevy Chase face is go]

Kids giving you a hell of a time?

[captain-jtkirk.livejournal.com]

No m'then usual.