.062 - it's hard to be a lady

[captain_jtkirk]

[Private to Bones]

Are you working in the Infirmary right now?

[Private to Uhura]

I have questions for you.

[Private to T'Pol]

Do you still have that thing I gave you for Christmas?

Comments

Private

[lt-n-uhura.livejournal.com]

Yes but...

Fine. I answered your question.

Private

[captain-jtkirk.livejournal.com]

I have other ones...

Private

[lt-n-uhura.livejournal.com]

Me first.

Why are you asking me this? Surely there are plenty of women who would love to answer these questions for you.

Private

[captain-jtkirk.livejournal.com]

Because I trust you?

Private- That's CHEATING

[lt-n-uhura.livejournal.com]

Oh alright. What are your other questions?

Private - FU THAT'S WHAT HE DOES BEST

[captain-jtkirk.livejournal.com]

Do you honestly have this heightened sense of smell all the time?

Private

[lt-n-uhura.livejournal.com]

I have no idea what you're talking about. What are you smelling?

Private

[captain-jtkirk.livejournal.com]

Everything. I used to have no problem with my quarters and now I can't stand it. It's like old sweat, whiskey and... some other stuff.

Private

[lt-n-uhura.livejournal.com]

Oh, I don't think it's really about a heightened sense of smell. I think it's about...caring more. I don't know, Captain. Your room has smelled like that every time I've been there.

Maybe you should clean it.

Private

[captain-jtkirk.livejournal.com]

I did. Pretty sure that the sex smell is never coming out.

Private

[lt-n-uhura.livejournal.com]

Oh, God.

Captain. Please. I do not want to think of you having sex. I caught you and Gaila at the Academy and that was more than enough, thank you.

Private

[captain-jtkirk.livejournal.com]

That better not be what you consider sex because we weren't even naked.

Private

[lt-n-uhura.livejournal.com]

YET!

What other questions do you have?

Private

[captain-jtkirk.livejournal.com]

To be honest, the mood died when she said that she loved me.

Pretty sure I have some kind of lump in my lopsided breasts. Still normal?

Private

[lt-n-uhura.livejournal.com]

She said-

Wait. No. A lump is not normal. How did you even find the- nevermind. Do not answer that.

Private

[captain-jtkirk.livejournal.com]

I'm really not proud of what happened with Gaila. For the record.

Uh... alright. But you ladies have them all the time, right?

Private

[lt-n-uhura.livejournal.com]

No, Captain. Lumps are not normal. You need to have that looked at. Depending on how long this flood lasts...

Private

[captain-jtkirk.livejournal.com]

Heh. It better not last much longer. I'm tired of being a woman. It's much better to just have sex with them.

Private

[lt-n-uhura.livejournal.com]

I hope it does not last much longer either, Captain. Being a man has done nothing but...

Well, it's boring.

Private

[captain-jtkirk.livejournal.com]

I bet you could convince Spock to overlook the man part.

Private

[lt-n-uhura.livejournal.com]

I wouldn't want him to.

Private

[captain-jtkirk.livejournal.com]

Why not?

Private

[lt-n-uhura.livejournal.com]

Because it would not be the same afterward. He would know that I talked him into doing something that he really did not want to do.

I do not want him to resent me for it.

Private

[captain-jtkirk.livejournal.com]

It wouldn't bug you that he's picky on how you look? You're still you under all of that. That shouldn't change anything.

Private

[lt-n-uhura.livejournal.com]

No. There is a fundamental difference in this and...say, gaining some weight. Or changing my hair.

I know that his feelings would not change if those happened but this...no. This is not simply a cosmetic change.