captain_jtkirk | A Message From Your New Captain

Entry tags:

A Message From Your New Captain

[Much like when the Admiral makes his announcements, the voice of one James T. Kirk floods the hallways and rooms of the Barge and he sounds oh so very pleased with himself.]

Attention people of the Barge.

We've had ourselves a little adventure recently and I won't bore you with the details because it's a long though at times, riveting tale. So I'll just cut to the chase: our dear Admiral isn't running this thing anymore.

I am.

James T. Kirk for those of you haven't had the pleasure. Along with Captain Harkness and Captain Solo who is taking control of the helm.

And yeah. That's all.

Have a nice day.

[ooc: Plot questions go here. IC freak outs or congratulations or WTFGETDOWNFROMTHERE happen here.]

Flat | Top-Level Comments Only

Meaning that you never use your private parts, so they've probably fallen off by now and so you can't be seduced at all.

I know this may be a hard concept for you to wrap your thick skull around but said parts don't break if you fail to use them for a day.

I'm pretty sure they break after three years. That's how long it's been since the ex right?

You're buying yourself another vaccine there farm boy.

[He adopts that terrible Southern drawl again, just for this one line:]

I'm Doctor Bones and I stab people with needles because I'm sexually frustrated and I really like to take it out on Jim because he's so much better looking then me.

Stick to your day job of angering mobs and twirling in that chair of yours, psychiatry isn't doing it for you kid. And what did I tell you before about butchering that accent?

[Accent's still there but now even MORE terrible.]

You know, you're goin' to ruin your ability to perform surgery if you keep abusin' your right hand like that.

Edited 2009-08-03 17:48 (UTC)

[he just groans at how painful it is.] What are you, twelve? Jim, if you do that accent one more time I am threatening Chekov with physicals until he leads me right to you.

[MORE ACCENT. With a dash of something like Jamaican thrown in.]

Ensign Chekov's safe from your tomfoolery, man.

[He's honestly not sure if he's exasperated or impressed. No, exasperated. Possibly amused despite himself. Possibly.] Is no dialect safe from you? I take it back before, tell me where you are so I can properly debunk this.

[He's laughing really hard right now, so forming an actual sentence takes him a minute.]

I don't want to know what you have in mind, so no. I don't think I will tell you.

[He's trying hard not to laugh at the ridiculousness, his voice is strained.]

Thought you liked surprises Jim.

Only the dirty ones.

I take back everything I said about you having grown up.

My heart.

She bleeds all over the place.

I think I have a syringe for that.

I'd rather take my chances with death.

Then it's a good thing Starfleet puts your medical fate in a doctor's hands.

I want a second opinion.

Live with your choices Jim. Captain chooses his CMO.

You're fired then.

You have a better chance getting Spock to tap dance.

Flat | Top-Level Comments Only

A Message From Your New Captain

voice and private

voice and private

voice and private

voice and private

voice and private

voice and private

voice and private

voice and private

voice and private

voice and private

voice and private

voice and private

voice and private

voice and private

voice and private

voice and private

voice and private

voice and private

voice and private

voice and private

voice and private

voice and private