.057 - lol actual back :c

[captain_jtkirk]

[Kirk could honestly say that he'd never returned in the middle of a breach or flood or whatever before. So that was weird. And it was even weirder to not realize he was back until after it all ended, and he was in his quarters, feeling like someone had punched his heart out and then hit him in the head with a hammer at the same time. He knew it wasn't Enterprise. He couldn't hear the hum of her engines and that always gave it away.

He was back on the Barge. And he couldn't say that he fully remembered why.

Jim forced himself to his feet, fighting against the wave of nausea and dizziness that came with it and left his room, wandering for a bit before he found himself in front of Dick's door. Not Bones because he'd worry and yell and it'd be weird with Shego and well. Here he was.

He reached up and knocked lightly, not even sure if Dick was there.]



[Video--several hours post flood and chat with Dick]

I'm back.

Comments

[imaythrowuponyou]

Bones just stared at him for several seconds before nodding. "Okay. Come on." He carefully moved to put a supportive arm around his back, half expecting Jim to shrug him off or shy away.

[captain_jtkirk]

Jim did shy away a little because damnit, he really didn't want to be touched and that didn't have anything to do with Bones, he was just... it was weird to know you were dying somewhere.

[imaythrowuponyou]

He stopped, frowning in concern. "It's okay, Jim." It's just me, everything's going to be fine. He'd even let you bring Aristotle into the infirmary.

[captain_jtkirk]

Shit whatever, Kirk had forgotten all about the dog, even though it had only been like two seconds since he last looked at him.

"It really isn't, Bones."

[imaythrowuponyou]

"It will be." Not that you were going to believe him anyway, but he hadn't given up on trying to make you understand what was going on here. "I promise."

[captain_jtkirk]

Jim ran a hand over his head, tugging on his hair sharply, just to distract himself from feeling like his chest was being broken open. "I just.. hate it here."

[imaythrowuponyou]

You didn't have to be dead to feel that way. "I know, kid. Come on, let's get out of the hallway."

The Admiral may or may not have dropped off some Christmas booze in the infirmary instead of his cabin. He can maybe be talked into sharing it with you.

[captain_jtkirk]

Jim nodded a little bit, and followed after him. "You got any booze stashed in there?"

[imaythrowuponyou]

"I might. Could probably be talked into sharing it, too."

[captain_jtkirk]

"Could be? I just died, Bones."

[imaythrowuponyou]

"I was kidding." He stepped into the infirmary and headed into his office, closing the door behind the two of them and the dog, gesturing towards the couch. "Sit. And don't tell anyone about this, I was gonna move it anyway."

[captain_jtkirk]

About a half second after Jim sat down on the couch, Aristotle jumped up next to him and pretty much made himself at home in Jim's lap. "I figured you had a stash on Enterprise too."

[imaythrowuponyou]

"You know full well I do," he said, trying to make it sound like a joke and sort of failing, because seriously, fuck everything, why are you back here. He grabbed a bottle of bourbon and two glasses, came over to sit next to Jim and poured them both a glass, handing one over to his friend.

[captain_jtkirk]

Jim knocked the entire thing back in one swallow because really seriously fuck everything. He sighed and put it off to the side, not really feeling any better but maybe now a little bit like he wanted to go to sleep and not wake up for a year.

"Do you even have an Inmate?"

[imaythrowuponyou]

McCoy was quiet for a moment before knocking back his own glass and putting it aside as well, because while he was all for this drinking together instead of alone, he really didn't want to get drunk right now and couldn't afford to, anyway. "No."

[captain_jtkirk]

Jim just started laughing in a hideously awful way, feeling like he just wanted to start crying now. He needed to be a lot drunker for this after hearing that because if Bones didn't even have an Inmate right now, he was just stuck here that much longer. Everyone knew that you didn't graduate an Inmate in like a few weeks, it'd be months and months and he wasn't really sure if he could handle that.

"Awesome."

[imaythrowuponyou]

Alright, that was both really concerning and kind of just adding more weight to all of this. "Jim, hey-"

He reached over to put a reassuring hand on his shoulder, squeezing gently. "You're going to get through this, alright? We're gonna get through this, and you're gonna be okay. I mean it."

[captain_jtkirk]

"I can't... be here that long. I just can't. And I'm just stuck here like some fucking Inmate. If I didn't still have a bathroom, I'd think I was one."

this one had the icon I wanted :c

[astrophobic]

"Jesus, Jim, I'm sorry. I should've-" Tried harder, been there sooner, none of that really made any sense to say when he'd thrown himself into trying to save him with everything he had, but it still kind of felt like his fault. "You're going to get out of here."

:c

[captain_jtkirk]

"Should've what?" Jim asked, looking at him suspiciously. "How is this even your fault?"

[imaythrowuponyou]

He stared back at him, really not sure how to answer that or how to react to the suspicion. "I don't-" He cut himself off abruptly, taking a breath and trying to rephrase. "I'm a doctor, Jim. I'm your doctor, and I'm the one who's supposed to piece you back together when shit hits the fan, and that just wasn't good enough this time, so now we're both stuck here."

[captain_jtkirk]

"We wouldn't be here if I didn't get myself into these situations in the first place. So shut up, it's not your fault."

[imaythrowuponyou]

He'd argue it was kind of both of their faults. And seriously, he'd blame himself if he wanted to. "Sorry."

[captain_jtkirk]

If they wanted to be technical, it was Spock's job to keep Kirk out of dangerous trouble like that and Kirk's own job to live by the rules of Starfleet. They existed for a reason.

"It's fine, I just... don't blame yourself."

[imaythrowuponyou]

It was everyone's fault. Happy now, Jim?

"I'll work on it."