captain_jtkirk

"Yeah but none of those attempts at saving my life involved any risk to you. Except for maybe like three fights but those didn't count cause I totally had them."

[Nevermind that he has a habit of fighting people bigger than him and usually fighting more than one person twice his size at the same time. He'll grow out of it someday.]

"You just gotta be less of an angry mother hen when I get into fights."

Edited 2009-07-21 06:28 (UTC)

Excuse me, I'll try throwing myself into danger more often then. [His tone is very pointed.] 'Had them'- you were lucky the bar keep pulled out his rifle that last time. Damnit Jim, if you need stress relief punch a damned punching bag, hard to believe that's what they're for.

[He trails off- ok so maybe that last tirade just proved Kirk's point. 'Mother hen,' he huffed.] You listen here Jim, blame me all you want for giving more than two shits about your well being but understand that's not going to change. Even if it's now your damned job description to wrestle hostile aliens. Believe it or not it's in my job description as your doctor and your friend to try and stop you from it if I can.

[Kirk tries not to smile through the rant. He didn't have anyone chastise him for his bar fighting behavior between the ages of seventeen when he finally gave up and left home and twenty two when Pike dared him to do something awesome. He likes that McCoy cares. It's been more than three years but the best friend thing is still kind of new and exciting.

Still trying not to smile, he crosses the room and leans down, looping an arm around the man's shoulders and then he climbs on top of the bed as well, all but tackling McCoy. Well, it probably looks more like hugging with a side of manly snuggling but he's calling it tackling.]

"Wrong. My job is to make sure my Inmate becomes a good person now. That involves very little hostile alien wrestling, as far as I'm aware. Pity though, it sounds like fun."

[McCoy scowls at the anything but chastised look on his friends face- like talking to a damned brick wall- continuing the scowl as he approached. He let out a huff at the 'tackling' but let him, lying back with an annoyed roll of his eyes before glancing back over, resisting the urge to inform him he was a doctor and not a teddy bear. Kirk's touchy-feely way was something he got used to pretty quick.]

Hostile wrestling or otherwise. [He mutters, shifting slightly for comfort.] How the hell do you even do that Jim? Rehabilitate these people. I have a guy who cuts off women's faces and wears them- and can't comprehend that it's as wrong as the day is bright.

[Jim makes a face at that.] "Ew. He sounds like a real treat. Pissed you didn't take me up on my offer to trade now, aren't you?"

[He puts his head down on McCoy's shoulder for a few moments, not really moving from the spot where they landed.] "First off, I'd take away his face cutting tools. Maybe warn the girls on the ship about him? Then you could threaten to shoot him. That worked out really well for me and mine."

Believe it or not he's polite enough. A damned tomcat though, hit on me less than a minute into our first chat. [The eye roll is in his tone.]

[He considers Kirk's suggestions for a quiet moment, enjoying the sounds of a normal, healthy ship. Hell, it almost felt like the academy given the cramped quarters and Jim dozing by his side.] I'm going to talk to his sister. Apparently she landed herself imprisonment here too- drug use or something like it. My primary concern is making sure no one's face gets cut off on my watch. [He sighs.] And not by physically threatening him. I'm a doctor Jim, promised to do no harm, remember?

"What a fiend. At least I had the decency to wait until you were done being nauseous. [That and the aviophobia from a guy who had just signed his life over to Starfleet was too amusing to do anything else but make fun of it.]

"I'm not a doctor, so I could shoot him for you? If he ever cuts off someone's face that is."

Not everyone can be a gentleman like you. [Yes, that is sarcasm.]

Gee thanks. [Dryly] No one's shooting anyone. If he pulls anything I'm taking that... face of his. I have a feeling it'll be worse than your trigger happy solution.

"Yeah I set real winning examples." [That's sarcasm right back at him with a shit eating grin on top of it.]

"What if you take his face away and then I get to shoot him? I'll put it on the lowest setting. There's a chance he might not even feel it if he's one of those freakish aliens. Is he an alien? I don't know of any face cutting human societies."

Yeah, real proud of it too. [That's an eye roll for that grin.]

[And a sigh.] I don't care if he's a wayward Klingon making cracks about your mother, you're not shooting him unless it's necessary- and punishment isn't necessary. [Kirk gets himself a raised eyebrow.] Don't tell me you go shooting that inmate of yours when he gives you lip.

"I'm pretty sure he'll have a heart attack if he's exposed to our fancy technology." [Kirk rolls his eyes a little bit. He makes the shape of a gun with his fingers and pretends to fire it. He's kind of waving his hand in front of McCoy's face, the result of their close proximity.] "He just calls me creepy nicknames until I threaten to take away his primitive writing crap. I think he's cured."

[McCoy snorts at that, batting Kirk's hand from his face.] Quit it before you poke one of our eyes out. [He shakes his head.] Listen to you, you sound depressed that your inmate doesn't romp about the ship trying to dismember people. If it annoys you so damned much ask for a new inmate. This is a volunteer program basically.

"He gave me this sap speech about how all of his old ones ignored him. I'm also pretty sure that he'll kill himself if I abandon him and that would make me look bad." [He waves his hand in front of McCoy's face just to be annoying before he takes it back.] "I just want something to do. Something exciting. I want off of this ship too. Two months is far too long."

How compassionate of you. [He grabs at Kirk's wrist for that.] If he's rehabilitated he's rehabilitated- who the hell decides on that anyway?

[He pauses a moment before really grabbing Kirk's wrist, scowling at him.] Oh no you don't, I just damned got here. Suck it up for another month or so.

"I don't know. It's probably rigged for all the progress that really happens around here."

[He frowns and tries to pull his wrist out of the other man's grasp.] "I'm talking about shore leave, asshole. And I'm supposed to be the one with abandonment issues."

Well that sounds promising. I'm surprised they didn't give you some troublemaker you could wear down with your pigheadedness.

[He rolls his eyes but lets go.] No, you're the one with wording issues apparently. Forgive me if the idea of sticking around with a glorified version of jack the Ripper while my best friend goes back to throwing himself into danger at every turn isn't very appealing.

[he pauses a moment.] Shore leave? To where, I'm not even sure what dimension we're in anymore.

"I'm sorry was it not implied that I when I return to the Enterprise, you'd be coming with me?" [Jim flicks the side of McCoy's neck for that. Maybe he left him on the Enterprise in the first place but he isn't going to leave Bones here.]

"Who cares where it is? So long as it's somewhere that isn't here. Leave the physics to the Russian kid. He likes that."

Smart ass. [McCoy glanced over at the flick, irritable but mostly appeased.] You're surprised? I half expect you to run back to your one true love when the whim takes you. I can't believe you lasted here for two whole months.

So what, you'll get a few days to romp around wherever the haul us to?

"You know? Sometimes I can't believe that I've made it this long either. Guess this place really is magical, huh?"

[Jim shrugs a little bit.]

"You miss the sunshine and ground beneath your feet and horses and whatever else you have in the south. I know you do. You'd love to get off this thing for a little while too."

Honoring your commitments- watch out Jim, you may be growing up.

[A pause at that then a resigned sigh.] Of course I do. 'Guess everyone gets sick of space and [a vague gesture] water, no matter how space happy they seem.

[Kirk makes a face.] "Yeah. It makes me uncomfortable just thinking about it. I need to start making fart jokes."

[He inspects his hand for a few moments before pointing at McCoy sharply.] "I love space. This isn't space. This is some other weird crap."

[He rolls his eyes.] Spare me, you don't have to prove your immaturity to me Jim.

[And he raises his brow at that pointing.] Space is weird crap. But you're right, I don't know what this is but it isn't anything Starfleet tried to prepare us for.

"I never said I'd make the jokes to i>you, grumpy pants."

[Kirk decides to mess up Bones' perfectly shaped hair, smirking as he does it.] "Much better. Now when you rant and rave, it'll go better with your look."

Oh look, you can be compassionate then.

[Bones tries to bat his hand away, grumbling at the action.] It's not 'ranting and raving' damnit, it's perfectly legitimate concerns any sane person would have- sane being the key word there farm boy. [he announces, tugging a hand through his hair in some poor attempt at fixing the damage.]

"Ouch. Using my childhood against me. You gonna make a crack about my dad next?" [Kirk sticks his tongue out at Bones and messes up his hair again, something he hadn't been planning on before it was necessary now since Iowa was brought into the conversation.]

.012

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